Monday, January 12, 2009

2008 Acheivement Awards

I'm a big fan of fabricating arbitrary awards that are otherwise meaningless, I guess I'm like Oprah in that way.
Here we go.


Best Movie Award
Nominees Included:
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
In Bruges
Lars and the Real Girl

The 2008 Winner of the "Best Movie" Award goes to...
NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN

I generally try to avoid terrible movies when at all possible. My in-laws, however have a strange fasination for them, so every once in a while I will test my mental dexterity by watching one.

The "Worst Movie" Award goes to... EAGLE EYE.
The "Movie Killer" Award
Nominees Included:
M. Night Shyamalan
Mike Myers
Shia LaBeouf

The "Movie Killer" Award goes to...
BRENDAN FRASER
Congratulations on two giant flops in 2008.


Favorite TV Series Award
Nominees Included:
Dexter
House
The Office

The 2008 Winner of the "Favorite TV Series" Award goes to...
Thank you Tina Fey for making at least one of the Baldwin's relevant again.

There is a fair amount of children television being watched in our household giving that we have a 3 year old. As you would expect, most of them are painful for adults with one exception.

The 2008 Winner of the "Favorite Kids Show" Award goes to...
YO GABBA GABBA

Soundtrack of 2008 Award
Nominees Included:
The Cure
Glen Phillips
Kate Bush
Neil Young

The Winner of "Soundtrack of 2008" Award goes to...
MORRISSEY

The 2008 "Repeat Album" Award goes to...
RADIOHEAD'S IN RAINBOWS

The 2008 "Musical Discovery" Award goes to...
RAY LAMONTAGNE
(Andrea is credited with this find)

Personal Photography Award
The 2008 Winner of the "Personal Photography" Award goes to...
REDRUM TUBBY

The 2008 Winner of the "Best Photo Compilation" Award goes to...
THE MANY FACES OF JEFFERSON TEMPLEMAN


Envy Awards
Female Envy Award Nominee Included:
Amy Ryan
Misty May-Treanor
Stevie Nicks

The 2008 Winner of the "Female Envy" Award goes to...
TINA FEY

The Sarah Palin thing just fell into her lap, but as the creator/writer and self effacing star of television's best show 30 Rock-- she deserves all of our envy. She hovers around a 7 on the "Hot Scale", but can be done up to a 8 or 9 with minimal effort.

Male Envy Award Nominee Included:
Asafa Powell
Ben Foster
Michael Jackson-- (money, music, and dance moves ONLY)

The 2008 Winner of the "Male Envy" Award goes to...

DAVID BECKHAM

'nough said!


The Ultimate Jagweed Award
Nominees Included:
Bill Belichick
Michael Phelps
Sean Hannity

The 2008 Winner of the "Ultimate Jagweed" Award goes to...

KIM JONG IL

Yes I realize Michael Phelps is petty in comparison to World War III, that why he didn't win... turns out he can't win everything. Belichick leaned that the hard way. Booyah!


Best Blog Post Award
Nominees Included:
Ma'Goon-- by Its the Life
The Story of Sally-- by My Friend Sally
There Will Be Blood DVD: The 3rd Revelation Edition-- Vox Espavesco, Vox Dei

The 2008 Winner of the "Best Blog Post" Award goes to... Lost-- by The Jolly Porter.

Good Times.

4 comments:

Rachel said...

I made your blog! I'm so excited! I've never gotten any awards, so a fake one is just as good as a real one to me. Before I got to the end I was going to ask you to create a fake award for me, but now I don't even have to and that makes me a tiny bit less pathetic. Yay!

Andrea Templeman said...

I want credit for the RAY LAMONTAGNE find. Maybe I should get an award for finding it/him. Cash rewards are always welcomed.

Rachel said...

I would like to point out that I realize I didn't actually win, but a nomination is just as good as a win to me. But thanks for taking the joy out of it RYAN.

Ryan Templeman said...

Were this the Olympics, you totally would have medalled-- and that's something to be proud of. Don't let anyone(even me), tell you otherwise.